SLEEPLESS

I was trying my best to gather some sleep today but I had a list of thoughts that kept me awake : SOME OF THEM WERE :
1.ARE THERE ANY PROSPECTS OF EMOTIONAL EVOLUTION LEFT IN US ANYMORE?
2.WHAT IF ALL OF US START LOSING TOGETHER IN THE RACE THAT WE VIRTUALLY RUNNING INTO ?
3.WILL THE SUCCEEDING GENERATIONS BE ALL THE MORE MECHANICAL OR WILL THEY BE EXHAUSTED OF TECHNICS?
4.WILL WE EVER HAVE AN ENLIGHTENED BEING AGAIN ON EARTH TO THE TRUEST SENSE OF THE TERM?
5.ARE WE PERFORMING THE SAME RITUALS EVERYDAY WITHOUT EVEN  REASONING THEM?
6.ARE WE INTO A VIRTUAL WAR WITH THE TRENDS AND TRADITIONS AND PLAY CONVENIENTLY WITH THEM AND CHANGE THEM AS IN HOW WE WANT?
7.ARE WE RESPONSIBLE ENOUGH FOR TREATING OUR COUNTRY OUR WORLD, THE SAME WAY AS WE DO,  OUR OWN HOMES FOR THAT REASON?
8.DO MIRACLES STILL HAPPEN? OR ARE WE LEFT TO OURSELVES BY THE CREATOR TO DO WHAT WE LIKE WITH THE EARTH FOR IT’S BEYOND CONTROL NOW?
9.WHAT DO WE CONSIDER GREATER OUR NEEDS OR THE PEOPLE AND PLACES WHO NEED US??
10. WHY HAVE PEOPLE STARTED LOSING FAITH, SO MUCH ON THEIR OWN SPECIES,  THAT THEY NEED A RECEIPT,  A BILL FOR EVERY NOMINAL TRANSACTION?
11.HAVE WE STOPPED WRITING PERSONAL LETTERS, COMPLETELY? NO HUMAN TOUCH EVEN FOR INVITATIONS OR DISTRESS NEWS?
12.DO WE BELIEVE OUR DOCTORS, NEIGHBORS, FRIENDS, FAMILY, MAIDS etc. Enough?
13.ARE THERE HIDDEN FACTS AMONGST SOUL MATES,  IF YES, WHY  CALL THEM SOUL MATES, IF NO, DO WE TELL THEM IN THE FEAR OF BEING CAUGHT BY PRIVATE DETECTIVE OR CCTVs?
14.DO WE LOVE OUR PARENTS JUST BECAUSE WE HAVE BEEN BETRAYED BAD BY AN OUTSIDER AND HAVE NO OPTION BUT TO SEEK RELIEF?
15.ARE WE SCARED THAT MY SIBLING, RELATIONSHIP,  MAY JUST INHERIT MORE THAN ME OR GET RICHER SOME OTHER WAY?
16.DO WE HATE TO SEE SOMEONE WE KNOW,  DOING BETTER THAN US?
17.ARE WE PERFECTLY INFORMED OF WHAT IS GOING AROUND THE WORLD ESPECIALLY IN DISTRESSED COUNTRIES OR JUST BOTHERED ABOUT THE NEXT EPISODE OF THE DAILY SOAPS?
18.SHALL WE RISK AN HARASSMENT TO SAVE A WOMAN OR CHILD IN DANGER OR JUST WALK AWAY?
19. HAVE WE ALMOST COMPLETELY SHIFTED TO JUNK FOOD AS STAPLE AND FEAR GOD ONLY WHEN WE DO SOMETHING WE KNOW IS INCORRECT?
20.ARE WE ALMOST AT THE BRINK OF A MORAL COLLAPSE?
PLEASE SPARE TIME TO ANSWER THEM?
Thank you for reading through…
Anubrata (Yugadhikari)

HOME OR NO HOME

Once we open our eyes into the world certain gifts are  bestowed on to us like-PARENTS, FAMILY, FRIENDS, BIRTHPLACE & most importantly is OUR HOME , THESE ARE NOT BY OUR CHOICE but given to us by the Almighty. All of us over time get accustomed to this happily & adopt to it so well that we begin to fall in love with these things by the time we are in sensible age. The warmth that we feel is possibly similarly to what we have had in our mother’s womb and now externally in our home, birthplace & surroundings too.

We grow up as individuals with various  choices now & one of the biggest choice we make is to share our lives with a partner by virtue of conjugal ties. However just with this one choice , begins to change most of our aspects in life that had been so dear to us all this while.

Say for example while a prospective groom loves to spend time with his friends , parents , & loved ones his time reduces considerably with them because he needs to share the same with his partner who enters his life quite late in life. While he loves doing this for certain amount of time, at the beginning of the relationship. Eventually , the desire to spend time alone declines & this phenomenon ( if we all are honest to ourselves) is but natural to occur.

Here on the other hand , the bride who is completely into a new ambience a new situation & is dependent mentally on her husband finds it difficult to build up the tempo at a very rapid pace all by herself.

Let us now rewind a little now socially , we cannot deny when marriage as an institution had developed in Indian society and  the concept of Vivah , by virtue  of Swayamvar, Gandharva, Asura or Prajapatya, the institution of marriage intended to bind souls from a very tender age to adopt to each other’s ways. But, we have changed & the change is definitely for our well being as marriage at a later age is found to be more stable, sustainable , healthy & women face less difficulties during childbirth than what happens in a tender age.

However the ill impact of a late marriage is that the two individuals are compact clay and  already well built mentally soulfully, socially , physically, & thus adopting to new terms & ambience is no less  than a  herculean task.

The bride ,who has to leave her home that had been her nest for an age of 25 years on an average in Indian society today & leaves behind many delightful soul candies that causes a rift in the couple when it comes to settle scores during  a conflict.

We have read widely that it is better to be alone than be lonely in a crowd or with someone in a relationship. The very fact that two individuals are making hard task decisions, adjustments compromises is the fact that they no longer remain what they were born as.

This write up does not intend to discourage couples who are willing to sacrifice their pleasures to make place for a new relationship.

The only intent is to find out whether it is essential for anyone to leave anything- like  a woman leaving behind her home and surroundings and in the process brings about an atmosphere of having made sacrifices and pushing for a rift because it is at the end of the day, she who leaves behind all, at a ripe age & stay up with her husband when she may not want to do so.. This in turn causes quite a pressure on the man too to make unwilling sacrifices because he is constantly reeling under the concept of  sacrifices and compromises of the lady.

Instead a marriage could be twined in a wilful, happy relationship that gives a choice to the couple to decide , how, why and what would they like to do to spend their time with each other in a beautiful and jovial stance.

Now that most women & men have their respective livelihood  & sense of earning, the old, metaphor of having a married home & leaving behind everything may not be essential for either gender who is economically well to do.  Rather doing things which are – happy, healthy & pleasing that does not disturb the tranquillity of the relationship may be a better way to look at the tie.

Before I end I would like to cite a common social phenomenon, where a woman who gets married at quite a substantial age of her life , to a man chosen by her family in a different city but by the time she leaves her place and she makes up her mind, that she would have to make many changes in accordance to the new needs of the relationship.  However in the process of making changes , the couple feels that the whole purpose of making up a home and the conjunct of companionship between the two individuals is almost completely lost. The process gets concentrated in making adjustments and compromises instead of reviving and enhancing the beautiful companionship between the two genders. Therefore a home is no home unless it does not go beyond just a daily routine and chores..

Please share in your varied ideas and concepts on this most talked about social relationship of companionship between a man and a woman.

Thank you for reading through.

Anubrata (Yugadhikari).

 

 

 

 

 

 

NEIGHBOR’S EYE

Unlike other animals amongst whom social relationships, post the process of procreation hardly matters, human beings are technically created to be sensitive to relationships throughout their life.

We as most advanced creatures of the Almighty- define lawful and unlawful relationships in our own terms for all genders.

However, just when we find that some untoward relationship around us is visible & it does not fit into the stipulated formula for the society we begin to stigmatise it. All of us would agree that we generalise , feel amazed & rethink on the acceptability of the relationship.

I wish to cite a short example on this-

A young, jovial and bubbly lady in her mid 20’s is apparently a teacher to a bunch of young boys who perhaps would be of her contemporary age or a year junior at the most. She, being a post graduate has sufficient qualifications  to be teaching others. However, the very fact that the age difference is seemingly low and in addition to the fact that she is still young to be a formulated teacher ( as per social terms ) raises quite many eyebrows in the neighbourhood. The scepticism of our society in such an instance is valid.

ORTHODOXLY WHY?

Because  I have also  read of many instances in the media where many kinds of crime including socially polluting , murders due to infatuated rejections, and an eventual ill  impact on successive generations has occurred. The question, therefore is, whether perhaps, an honest , rightful, sanctified teacher of the age as mentioned is doing anything incorrect or is it our stipulated rules , incorrect?

It is basically quite an unsolved issue while on the one hand , we are virtually, hindering some one from exercising their liberty to practice the profession they want, on the other hand, whether the profession is duly practised may remain quite a  mystery behind doors of individual homes.

This topic does not end here as actually this gender vis-vis relationship does not have anything in black or white, it is all in grey. We may continue this aspect in case of co mingling of any two persons of opposite genders in any venue concerned.

They may just be casual friends. They may be in love, may be an acquaintance only. We as social beings stigmatise, add fire to it and bring the two individuals to the brink to either part or even rethink whether they are allowed to remain an acquaintance in the neighbour’s eye.

Please share your  thoughts in the comments section below.

Thank you for reading through….

Anubrata(Yugadhikari)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Woolen Sweater!!

In this chilling weather,  the most important thing that we look for is winter wear- could be sweat shirts, long over coats,  leather jackets, various light weighted shawls and heavily worked covers. We purchase these spending a lot of money online,  bargain with Street sellers and so on.. The trends and  styles keep changing and we move with the herd to follow the trends. However, the warmth in knit sweaters, that our mothers,  sisters,  or anyone who would be expert in such skills are nowhere to be found anymore.  Rarely,  do we see anyone around wearing anything that is woven, knit, embroidered or skillfully painted. Sometimes it is because we find it obsolete and sometimes because it is hard to meet anyone these days who are skilled into it or have the time to spare to create those.
This topic is quiet a delight for the readers who feel that yes we may say that,  women are no longer interested in household and usually feminine skills as before, and, therefore needs quite a detailed discussion (read criticism) ; but that isn’t necessarily true as men used to be equally skilled,  equipped and experienced in manual art since the ancient Indian Harappan Civilization which eventually diminished.  There were artisans, pottery makers,  and painters which were pleasing to every eye.
This traditional and not just in the interior of rural India but also into our homes with Woolen,  Hand-Woven sweaters,  embroidered covers, and other household art works have lost the trend so much that neither the demand nor the experts are anywhere to be found anymore.  People now would prefer playing mobile games, chat over the Internet or maybe watch a quick movie instead of building up a hobby that is creative. (Infact the usual introductory question- What is your hobby? has also been almost buried,  because rarely does anyone have one these days,  there are many ways of spending time rather than cultivating a hobby and wasting time – per logic these days)
The style or hobby aspect can still be sidelined,  what cannot be overlooked is that those of us who are experts only in these skills are facing tough competition due to dipping demands all throughout now and then we blame the Authorities for not being able to rehabilitate the manual workers,  the thought that provokes consciousness is that as members of this society,  do we not have any responsibility to do the least we can to progress as much we can but also retain the heritage and art that made us proud someday in the world.
Say,  we go for tours  all around the country today,  it is so easy today to travel, we upload our innumerable selfies,  posters,  group photos with strange disfigured fingers pointing in some direction. May we not click pictures of the work or the artisans and eventually promote their work,  so that the next time someone else visits the same place,  they know where and what exactly to buy that which  looks good and that it helps to retain the potentiality of our invincibly talented art masters.
We wait for Mega fairs,  malls to bring in few pieces just as a matter of prejudice and we buy them at much higher prices just to ensure that the next time someone visits our home we are able to portray the exquisite choice of collection we have..
The same doctrine applies to the wear,  covers and art work made by our mothers too,  do we realise that the pace in which crafts is losing importance it is but natural that expertise will die one day and in a way that it can never be restored..
I am sure, the generation that knew the skills are almost on the brink of getting over. The least we can do now is atleast take pride in wearing a work that is gifted to us with love,  warmth and affection,  because we never know just the way Indian process of Telegram, Hand  written love letters have gone in the gallows,  so will the warm,  love filled hand woven sweaters.. Time to think and Act!!!

Thank you for reading through…
Anubrata(Yugadhikari)

FREE SHOW

Today,  instead of beginning with an explanation, description or question or answer,  let us begin with a story –

One morning, while on her walk, a lady heard a screeching sound of brakes,  she turned to find that a bike that  had two men stopped suddenly and began  hitting a lean, juvenile, boy who usually delivers newspaper in the locality,  the men looked well built, well to do and they looked better educated in obvious terms than the newspaper delivery boy.  The lady seemed brave heart and rushed to the scene to stop the fist fight but the men on the bike was powerful enough and the lady had to raise her voice and eventually on that early morning when the streets are normally deserted had few men gathering to the scene. By now,  whether by virtue of the elderly lady’s feeble voiced efforts to prevent the fight or slow accumulation of public to  get entertained. The conflict finally stopped,  now when the lady and the public waited briefly to know the reason for the fight they realised that the reason they were hitting the boy in the bicycle was that he rode past the motorcycle in a way that there was a possibility of an accident and that the handle of his bicycle brushed across the mirror of their bike. Now when they stopped,  the boy in the bicycle due to the humiliation or maybe in anguish began to try and hit back the men on the bike. When the public and the lady voiced out that he was doing the same thing that caused her to fight against them, the boy settled down and so did the others and finally the episode ended. 

Now,  a second and more aggravated scene when a rickshaw puller was being hit constantly by few men for having asked fora rational fare for a rickshaw ride that was taken by them,  this time it is a mid-aged business man who tried to stop them and in the whole affair,  they hit the man back so bad that he finally lost his life. Ironically all this happened in broad daylight when passers- by did not wait but Passers by not wanting to make a move is not new to us.  (we well remember the 16.12.2012 incident when passers by did not stop to help a fatally injured, perishing woman and her friend and left them in the cold to die,  besides as women would know the plight when they do not fight back even when outraged in the fear that no-one would come to her rescue in case of an argument)..  This incident where the mid aged man died battling to save the rickshaw puller made news nationwide.

These two incidents has been cited consecutively for a very simple reason,  that if the second incident would be in knowledge of the woman,  would she take a step ahead to save the boy from those men who seemingly were more powerful than the lady herself.

The crux in this detail is that – when we see any unusual incidents on the streets we watch,  capture videos,  upload on the Internet but do not make a move to save lives or help anyone who is genuinely in despair at that moment,  all this for a reason that we fear our safety,  which is a valid reason but do we make any other effort like try to gather mass around and seek help or make an SOS call to the police, we fear being trapped in the intricacies of the  incident and therefore ignore the incident but what we do not fail to do is get entertained.  As an onlooker we wait,  watch the whole show and then move away, to continue with our daily chores.

It is not the law breakers who are outraging the decency of the environment on the streets but the onlookers also who not only remain unbuffered by the incident but leave the outragers at their liberty to do what they want without fearing the power of the public.

It was taught to us during childhood,  that a bundle of sticks is difficult to break as compared to a single stick, therefore a combined effort to stop such incidents will create a scare amongst the ones who fear no law,  no public or no society and the mischief may be prevented.  It is not too difficult to make a call with phones available with all of us and try atleast help whether that brings result or not.  An intelligent and safe try for any task is atleast worth a try.

Most of us would have come across such incidents on the streets at some point of time. Please use the comments section below to discuss anything relevant and share for awareness.

Thank you for reading through…

Anubrata (Yugadhikari)

HAIR COLOR

While the nation is worried about employment for young generation,  the mid age potential but unnoticed group of people between the age of 40-60 years who have almost lost the opportunity of not taking birth in the tech-era and are losing grip and none of us are worried about them.
They are not old,  not sick,  not dependent and therefore do not need our attention?? Is that really so?
I know a lady who was well educated by her parents when during the 70s era,  women – education just creeped in our nation widely,  but was immediately married off and could not really do much of the education she received from her parental place,  she is now done marrying her children off and has got nothing much to do,  whilst her husband is busy with the worldly affairs  including politics,  post retirement investments,  planning holidays,  and post work committee membership etc. She, while is educated and knows most of the things that is expected of a sophisticated lady but is not able to buckle up to walk parallel with her family wherein her children is busy in their lives,  husband in his’ and she has got her potential wasted so well today,  that she has not got much to do now.  She takes to gardens to plant new flowers,  knits wool,  talks to her unwilling children and husband who is not really much interested in her greying hair, except for the best cuisines that she prepares to the best of everyone’s  interests but nobody is really interested in what she wants or what could please her. What is worrisome all the more is that – her age doesn’t even permit to go out looking for jobs anymore as we have age restrictions in all the sectors of work today including private and public sector where no matter how well skilled or fit you are,  you are not allowed to join the race with respect to the age that you have got yourself into.  This doesn’t sound too rational though. How does her age matter in any sector,  as long as she knows what is to be done at the work she takes up..  Please leave in your opinion in the comments section below, if you think there’s any different opinion you have about the aspect. 
The western countries allows members of various ages to enter school and college when they want and feel the need,  we possibly do not allow the potential members amongst us to run in the race as we want the competition cut short.
I would not want to sound feminist  by citing only women here.  I know that a lot of members from the other gender who are tasking it hard to cope up with technology taking over manual tasks at their work place,  they feel humiliated of not knowing the systems well and find it tough to cope up with the younger generation who are born tech savvy considering that they have mobile phones and computers in their hands from the moment they are born. We may now become argumentative about it- that people who are not competent may be impending the progress of the sector. However do we really just need competitive and not experienced people? I think it is important to not waste their potential and open up space for people who have equipped themselves well in their era,  got themselves educated learnt their skills well but are failing to keep up pace due to changing social scenarios,  due to gradual globalisation and to top it all,  the dawn of technology.
The recent census have shown while 41% of the Indian population is under 20 years 9% is above 60 years,  the rest 50% is between 20-59 years.  This generalisation is too huge  to decide whether the demographic dividend is really working in favour of our progress or working against because if these are the numbers to go by,  half of our 50% population will not be allowed to enter any sector of work place because we have age restrictions by virtue of regulations or social pressures.
This is a virtual discrimination per age, because we still live as per the pre independence norms where people entering a certain age were considered rudimentary in the society.  If we are truly globalising we need to adopt the progressive aspects of the various cultures where age is nothing more than  just a number.
Thank you for reading through… Anubrata(Yugadhikri)

Marriage vs Mela

The colonial rule in India had supported their expenditure on building summer capitals in Shimla and depriving the needy sections of society by projecting that Indians have a lot of money already in spending on pompous marriages and festivals.
Today, the same colonialism is felt when society,  family and the participants of the marriage themselves press their parents to spend as much as possible on their marriages.
I met a lady in Bengaluru,  who on the day of her daughter’s marriage was inviting closed ones for GRIHA PRAVESH,  I congratulated her but inquisitively asked whether the house she is shifting from is nomore accommodative..  She answered that she had sold her property for her daughters marriage and instead took up a one room kitchen to stay with her husband and invested all that they had to get her daughter married in the most lavish manner possible. I was not surprised. This is familiarity now.
When we as children used to go to large wedding celebrations and used to be served by caterers and were able to be seated as guests and did not have to look for seat around with food plate worth Rs. 1000/- and not have a chair to sit in the fair like marriage   the status symbol would be the size of the fish and the number of dishes on the menu.  The scenario has changed now ; The status symbol now,  is how large the Mela is- When the guests enter – they start with pani puri and leave with gold plated or at the least silver coins.
The expenditures are increasing,  so is the criticism immediately after the guests leave the venue ,  when they feel there is something missing in the fulfilment of their expectations as guests   Maybe they were expecting a stall for dart game,  or monopoly that didn’t exist or maybe the cuisine needed some more than just Thai, Japanese,  or Italian.
There is no harm in spending on happy occasions but the pressure exerted on those who find it difficult to afford is a worry,  it is though natural for every member to feel under privileged unless they are able to keep pace with trends.  (Say for example,  not having a mobile phone today is not just out of trend but inconvenience too, we tend to ask members from every strata if they possess a cell phone to ensure easy communication) Likewise not spending on marriages sound not just out of trend but implants suspicion on the minds of family and fellows as to what the reason behind not celebrating the marriage could be? (The simple answer to the suspicious mind is : MARRIAGE by definition of Vedic era terms is a conjunction between two individuals, it’s a choice of living together and the social sanction for their biological needs may be approved anyways, without having to spend)
I askef the other day to a not so well to do lady around as to what her biggest concern is –  She replied,  she had to save to spend on her daughter ‘s marriage and needed out of proportion sum.  I advised why doesn’t she keep it simple,  she replied, her daughter demanded she must not be sent like a pauper from her house to her in laws and that would also make sure that she got sufficient amount of respect when she entered her new home.  The reason cited was disturbing,  as if her daughter didn’t realise,  how much her parents was capable of.  She insisted on LED tv set, and a second hand vehicle for her and her husband,  which was very apparently a huge burden for her parents.  When I spoke about the same thing to one of my neighbor and in the casual talk,  I mentioned why don’t people instead donate blood,  feed poor and needy,  or take care of sick and old to mark the beginning of  a new journey with divine tasks,  my neighbor replied the good things are done as show off,  I without being vocal about my thought further wondered,  isn’t spending  on marriages,  purchasing  a saree,  lehenga,  or expensive dresses and jewelry that are too heavy to be worn again,  show off too…??
Pompous marriages or for that reason celebration of any festival with too much of extravaganza is taking a toll on the savings of those parents who shall need it in their old age once their children leave,  similarly,  maintaining a  reputation by virtue of marriages that are expensive may not be a good idea. (recently read about the split of one of India’s top ten richest man’s daughter after having spent abundant money for the wedding).
The money,  time,  effort can rather be saved for a future that is progressive,  modern and contributing to the society.  Youngsters need to take efforts today in refusing to spend anything unwarranted on their wedding and utilise the resources in getting a good,  secured, life for their parents who are aging and the society that needs them and their continued contribution for better and rational reasons..  I have attached a simple example of a progressive contribution by a wedding group for your glance…
Please share the thoughts to friends and family for a better society.  Your comments, criticism and appreciation is essential.
Thanking you for reading  through..  Anubrata (Yugadhikari)